Be A Man, Kyle Broflovski
by Darkest-Shades
Summary: Kyle can't wait to finally be considered an adult. Will him coming of age prove he's ready to do things on his own or will it take a little bit more than a bar-mitzvah to prove to him and everyone else that he's ready to be a man? Slash


In this story, the boys are only 12-13. I know it's a bit young, but that's around the time Kyle would have to start preparing for his bar mitzvah since the coming of age for young males is 13. I'm not Jewish, and I still haven't seen all of South Park yet, so you'll just have to go with the flow of this. Also, you can correct me if I'm supremely wrong. :) I might try to speed up time to bring them to proper ages, but for now, who knows if I'll even get through another chapter:P This is my first SP ficcy. Oh boy.. 

BIG warning, there is going to be some slash. I can't help myself, I'm sorry. XD (Kyle x Stan, Kenny x Butters?)

**Be a Man, Kyle Broflovski**

_If you can keep your wits about you while all others are losing theirs, and blaming you. . . . The world will be yours and everything in it. What's more, you'll be a man, my son. - Rudyard Kipling_

Kyle sighed as he closed his heavy blue bible. Scratching a hand through his mess of curly auburn hair, his tired eyes darted to the analog clock hanging to the left of his desk. They rapidly shot open the moment his brain registered the time; 7:45.

'Oh shit!' his cursed silently. He quickly sat up from his chair, grabbing his orange coat as he did so, and jogged down the stairs to collect his shoes. His mother appeared in the kitchen doorway, her hands busily drying off a dish. Her eyebrows furrowed at Kyle's rush.

"Where are you going, boobie?" she asked, stopping a moment to put a hand on her busty waist.

The young teen was busily hopping around, trying to get his left shoe on, before he leaned against the plush couch and balanced himself for support, "I'm going to the movies, Ma, remember? Stan and them invited me to go see the Terrance and Phillip movie coming out tonight. I'm late." he replied hurriedly, shoving on his trademark green flap hat before tugging open their front door.

His mother's eyebrows twitched at the mention of Terrance and Phillip, and her lips defined into a thin line, "Did you finish all your homework and studies?" she questioned, the demanding chord laced in her words stopped Kyle in his tracks as he sighed.

"Yes, Ma. I finished all my homework earlier and I just got done with reading the beginning of the Torah. I promise I'll continue reading it tomorrow, but I'm running late, Ma, so I'll see you!" He quickly stepped outside onto the semi-wet pavement of his front porch and shut the door, making sure his keys resided in the front of his pocket as he jogged out to the sidewalk. The door of his house opened, revealing the outline of his mother.

"I want you home by 9:30, boobie!" she shouted at his retreating back, "Do you hear me, young man?"

Without turning back, Kyle lifted a hand in response, telling her he got the message. With a shake of his head, he power-walked his way to the Bijou theatre where, hopefully, his friends were still waiting.

'Yeah, I seriously doubt Cartman's fat ass would wait for anything.' he thought with a despondent gruff.

The front of the theatre was fairly vacant, except for the lanky frame of a familiar black haired boy, in a brown coat and blue/red bobble hat leaning against the side entrance. His head was turned in the opposite direction, apparently looking around for the auburn haired boy.

"Stan!" Kyle called out, catching the blue-eyed teen's attention immediately, "Hey, sorry, I'm late! Where are Kenny and Cartman?" he asked, brushing off the front of his jacket.

The other boy stared at him and jabbed his thumb towards the inside of the theatre, "They went in already, dude. You're like twenty minutes late, Kyle." he said, a bit aggitated at the fact that he was missing most of the movie and that he had to decided to wait for his friend in the cold.

"Sorry, I know. I just lost track of time, studying and all. But I appreciate the fact that you waited for me, dude. You could have went inside with them." Kyle replied, rubbing the back of his neck.

"And listen to fatass complain the entire time about how all the chocolate and popcorn was probably gone by then? Yeah, right." Stan remarked, with a roll of his eyes. His red-gloved hands reached into the front pocket of his coat and fished out two tickets.

"I already got your ticket so let's go." he said with a tilt of his head towards the doors.

"Who'd you get to buy you these this time? Another bum?" Kyle queried with a smile, taking the ticket from his best friend. Stan flashed him back a bright smile of his own.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, dude." he replied innocently, the trace of a smirk still lighting his face. Kyle shook his head and followed his friend inside.

ooo

"The part where Terrance and Phillip did interpre-fart dancing in the ballroom and lit Kevin Bacon's ass on fire was the best!" the brown-haired boy praised loudly, spilling candies on the floor with his huge gestures as the four boys walked out of the movies with the crowd. Kenny laughed in agreement.

"Yeah, and then they did a three-part symphony with their asses. That was great." he added, wickedly smiling beneath his orange hood.

"What? I don't remember that part." Kyle replied with a confused glance over to Cartman who still had a box of Choco-buddies clutched in his pudgy fingers.

"Oh, I'm sorry Kyle. That was at the beginning of the movie. You know, the part you didn't see, because your Jewish-hippie ass wasn't at the movies on time." he responded smugly, as he shoved a handful of chocolate into his mouth.

"Hey fat-boy, I was studying and getting some work done. Something you'll never comprehend because you've never done any work in your life!"

Cartman mimicked the redhead up until the insult registered his brain, "Tuh! I don't have to study because I'm already superiorly smart, you lame Jew." he spouted, bits of chocolate spraying out of his mouth.

"Yeah right, fat-ass, which is why you're stuck in all the dumb-ass beginner classes at school." Kyle retorted, complacently folding his arms in front of him. Stan and Kenny just stood off to the sides, used to Kyle and Cartman's verbal sparring.

"Yeah-well-" Cartman paused, trying to come up with a better repartee, "Well, at least I don't have a curfew on weekends, lame-o! Shouldn't you be getting home to mommy, Jew?"

Kyle paused, ignoring the fact that Cartman was right, and checked his watch. The time read 9:42.

"Shit, dude! Shit, I have to go." he replied irritably, glaring at the tubby boy who smiled smugly back. He began to depart from the group when he felt a hand grasp his arm.

"Hey dude, we're still hanging out tomorrow right?" Stan questioned curiously, glancing at his friend for an answer.

"God, you two are such faggots."

"Shut up, Cartman!" the green-eyed boy snapped before responding to Stan, "Yeah, if I'm not grounded or anything at least, we should be able to. I'll see you later, guys."

"Tuh, good riddens, Jew!" Cartman shouted as Kyle began walking away.

ooo

Kyle unlocked his front door and slowly pushed it open, only to be greeted by a screechy cry.

"Where have you been, young man!"

Kyle sighed inwardly, "I told you I went to the movies-"

"You should have been home fifteen minutes ago!" Sheila Broflovski interrupted, her hands balled into fists upon her hips.

"Ma, I can't help that the movie ended later than expected-" he said, trying to defend himself.

"You could have left and came home early. You know I hate you being out late, Kyle! There's all kinds of crazy people who come out at night."

"Who in South park would-"

"Crazies, Kyle! Maybe when you become an adult, you'll be more responsible with your time, young man. As for right now, you'll go to your room and get to bed."

Kyle grumbled, saying it was hardly fair that he was the only kid he knew in South Park who had a damn curfew.

"What was that, young man?" his mother's voice remarked, piercing his thoughts.

"Nothing, Ma. Goodnight." he said, continuing to trudge up the semi-creaky stairs of his house.

"You better be up bright and early for your religious lesson tomorrow, boobie! Don't forget that your bar-mitzvah is coming up!"

How could he forget with her constantly reminding him? He couldn't wait until he was an adult and his parents would get off his back. Too bad it wouldn't happen for another few weeks or so. God, he didn't know if he could take his mother reminding him about it all for another twenty-four days until his birthday. At the top of the stairs, his eight year old brother stood in the doorway to his room, his eyes on Kyle. He smiled at his elder brother, one front tooth missing from an incident concerning a fresh red apple.

"Got in trouble again, huh?" the black haired boy replied cheekily, bouncing on the balls of his stocking-clad feet.

"Shut up, Ike." Kyle muttered, kicking at his brother's legs before shutting himself up in his room. God, he couldn't wait.


End file.
